As a teacher, each approaching fall sends me into panic and fear. Teachers can attest to the nightmares they begin to face as August comes to an end. Who will be in my class this year? Will they learn? How will I find time? Being a Christian teacher in a public school bears a greater weight. When I am melting under the pressure of 23 students, parents, and administration, I must represent Christ.
God has called me to be a teacher. Not just any teacher, but a teacher in a public school in 2024, where a confused and sometimes well-intended culture seems to oppose God at every turn. Working in this environment has been extremely difficult for me. My deep sadness over the children in my class and an inability to change the system allowed frustration and anxiety to grow. I was left wondering why God has me at my job, in my school. I felt like I was failing the kids and failing God. I felt like I was a bad Christian. I began lamenting to the Lord in Psalm-like anguish:“Why Lord? What do you want from me here!”
God always answers and reveals himself even when the world tries to block him out. Just when I need him the most, God shows me that he is present in my school. On one occasion it was through a story called The Goliath Spider. As the children read about the spider, I asked why it is called the Goliath Spider. One child responded by sharing the Bible story of David and Goliath with the class, and I was reminded of God’s relevance and activity in my classroom.
The Spirit also pointed out a student of mine from the previous year. He was one of my challenging kids but so lovable. He made a habit of hiding in my closet and room most mornings. On occasion he brings me a hash brown from McDonalds. God has shown me why he has me on the front line through this student. He needs me to pause and listen. He needs me to look in the children’s eyes and open my ears to hear their stories. In a time where kids are marginalized in busy families, misguided systems, and frazzled teachers, some students just need to be seen. God sees them and he calls me to see them, too.
God in his mercy and grace gives me these needed glimmers of light, but I must do my part as well. Isaiah 6:8 says, “Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, ‘Whom shall I send and who will go for us?’ And I said, ‘Here I am. Send me!’” God calls us all, and we must respond. For me to walk through this darkness, I must rely upon God. I must pray and read his Word. I will not melt under the pressure with God’s solid foundation to hold me.
God is showing me that there is light even in the darkest places, and that being a teacher is more than a worldly position and more than state testing scores. He has planted me there to represent him. By displaying Christ through me, some children in my class might see him. Before I was following Christ, I wanted to be remembered as a good teacher. Now, when my students look back, I want them to think, “I bet Mrs. Pearce was a Christian.”
