{Steph, on the right, with a friend and fellow community group member}
Doing life together in community has been one of the greatest blessings in my life. I’ve realized, though, that living in community is rare and may even seem a little strange in this day and age when living in isolation and loneliness is the norm in America. However, community has been a blessing to me.
I’ve learned many lessons over the past decade while living and growing with a group of sisters in the Lord, but one overarching theme that stands out is this: everyone we interact with is a sinner in need of a Savior.
One of my favorite things that Jared Mellinger says as he welcomes guests to the church is that our church is not a museum of perfected saints, but rather a hospital for the needy and the broken and the sinful. If we can keep this in mind in our interactions, it makes living life together in community not only possible, but beautiful.
When Isaiah encountered the Lord, as recorded in Isaiah 6:5, he said, “For I am lost; for I am a man of unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips; for my eyes have seen the King, the Lord of hosts!”
That’s us. That’s me! I am a sinner in need of a Savior, and so are all of the people around me. This creates a level playing field. If we’re talking to another sister or brother in Christ, it’s helpful to remember that they are in the same battle as we are. They may be walking through different circumstances and different trials, but like us, they need to look to Christ for the victory as they fight their sin.
How do we live out this truth in real-life community? Here are a few thoughts to consider.
1) Give more grace: It’s safe to assume that you are going to be sinned against and you are going to sin against others. Expect it. Become a person who is quick to extend grace and forgiveness and even quicker to repent and ask for forgiveness.
2) Fix your gaze: 1 Peter 4:8 says that “Love covers a multitude of sins,” and Matthew 7:5 reminds us to take the log out of our own eye before worrying about the speck in our brother’s eye. Be a person who helps others be more aware of Jesus rather than a person who nitpicks at other people’s sins. When we fix our gaze where it needs to be and stand in awe of him, like Isaiah, we’ll want to fall on our faces in repentance. In contrast, when we fix our gaze on sin and try to fix ourselves or one another, it’s more than likely that discouragement will reign because the remedy for sin is Christ, not our efforts.
3) Don’t compare: In John 21, Peter is worried about what Jesus is doing in John’s life, but Jesus redirects Peter, saying, “What is that to you? You follow Me.” So let’s stay in our lane, sisters. Remember that God has a purpose and plan for your life. God will grow and use each person in your community differently. Embrace it. We may have the same destination, but different paths. Become a cheerleader and encourager for how God has called each of the people he has placed around you.
4) Stay: In today’s cancel culture, it’s the norm to plug our ears and cancel people when we don’t hear what we want to hear. Life in community sometimes requires hard conversations. As Christians, we can’t just cancel our brothers or sisters and run. In fact Proverbs 15:31 says, “The ear that listens to life-giving reproof will dwell among the wise.” Don’t church hop or run away from community when you hear hard things. Stay. Some of the greatest friendships have been deepened and forged through hard conversations where misunderstandings were worked through. If you run, you may miss out on that.
Life in community can be hard and it may seem like a daunting task, but it’s worth it. Together, we can link arms and say, “Let’s go! This may be hard, but we’re in it together. I’m a sinner, and you’re a sinner, but we have a great Savior. Let’s set our gaze on him. Let’s press on toward him.”
I hope this encourages you to step out and live life with others. Yes, people will see your sin. Yes, you’ll see their sin. But even more, you’ll see Christ getting the victory and the glory through the community that he builds.
